Are the "Snorks" retarded?
A long and frustrating late-night Googling session (in search of that Glade air freshener commercial with the cartoon octopus) found me face to face with my childhood friends the "Snorks."
Now like most of my favorite childhood cartoons (Gummi Bears, Thundercats, that one where the guy turns into a car), I'm pretty sure my preference for the Snorks was based only on the fact that the other things on at 5:30 in the morning on a Saturday were worse. The Snorks, for those who don't know, are a horrible underwater version of the Smurfs. (Both come from Belgium.) One serious issue with the Snorks is whether one can accept them, given the fact that they lamely ante-date the Smurfs. In general, I am against anything but the original version: Allan Quatermain, "third wave" feminism, and the Wendy's 99 cent chicken sandwich, to name a few.
The real reason The Snorks sucks, though, is that the Snorks are just a bunch of snotty American teenagers, instead of European eco-communists. As if in the real world anything could ever get worse by putting it underwater. The whole business is pretty shameful.
Now like most of my favorite childhood cartoons (Gummi Bears, Thundercats, that one where the guy turns into a car), I'm pretty sure my preference for the Snorks was based only on the fact that the other things on at 5:30 in the morning on a Saturday were worse. The Snorks, for those who don't know, are a horrible underwater version of the Smurfs. (Both come from Belgium.) One serious issue with the Snorks is whether one can accept them, given the fact that they lamely ante-date the Smurfs. In general, I am against anything but the original version: Allan Quatermain, "third wave" feminism, and the Wendy's 99 cent chicken sandwich, to name a few.
The real reason The Snorks sucks, though, is that the Snorks are just a bunch of snotty American teenagers, instead of European eco-communists. As if in the real world anything could ever get worse by putting it underwater. The whole business is pretty shameful.
posted by Allan Hazlett | 1:14 AM
2 Comments:
Dude, Thundercats totally stands up. I mean, Mumm-Ra! Genius.
http://tcats.shipunderground.com/hooo.wav
I also object to the Snorks. Not only do they sport incredibly stupid grins and outfits, they also seemed (if I remember correctly) woefully misinformed about the sea and--even worse--wholly uninterested in their aquatic environment. At least the Smurfs cared about their forest, taking care not to litter while seeking out interesting mushrooms and smurfberries. Did the snorks ever try to find anything out about their sea home? Did they ever stop to investigate the intriguing yet low-lying cucumber that they passed on their way to the mall? Did they ever stop to appreciate the beauty of the comely Manatee as they rushed off to class? i think not.
if you ask me, someone should have stuffed the snorks down one of the superheated deep sea vents long ago.
as i side note, i also hated that cartoon about those wee folk called "the littles." they were so such do-gooders. at least the smurfs had that selfish smurf, vanity. i loved vanity. and cook, the glutton smurf. his cakes always looked so good.
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